The scream tunnel is one of Wellesley's most beloved traditions so naturally it makes today's photo.
Everything about today was perfect-the weather was gorgeous and cool enough for the runners(I hope), there was a course record and an American won the marathon for the first time in a long time. It was just really fun today. All the runners started smiling as soon as they hit the scream tunnel, and I think it's one of the few times that this campus is united to this extent.
I grew up in Hopkinton which is the starting line and so I've been watching this race for basically my entire life. Therefore, I can say with certainty that this is one of the good years, I really couldn't imagine better conditions. And considering last year, I couldn't imagine it being any other way.
I think in my own life it is so odd to think of what happened a year ago. Of course, there's the tragedy of the bombing but for me personally it's odd to think of the person I was, the people I was with and overall where I was with everything in my academic life. And I am relatively sure that things have changed for the better. But absolutely sure that things are very different now than they used to be.
You may be wondering why I chose to put up this picture as something that makes me happy but there is actually something really calming about working in this space. Nobody is really trolling around today because it is a 1) a weekend, 2) a long weekend and 3) Easter Sunday. These little corrals are technically reserved for thesis students but I actually quite like using them to do work. In addition to the sounds of water (which as a self proclaimed fish-on-land, is really therapeutic), there is actually also a decent amount of natural light that gets in here, more than in the Leaky Beaker and other places in the building and I have a nice view of Galen stone tower from my particular corral. I keep using the same one though so I might stake a claim to it soon. While I know some students hate the Science Center with their entire being, I really honestly don't mind being here. I don't mind being here on weekends or at nights. I think what makes me grumpy sometimes is the fact that it feels like I -have- to be here when I would rather be doing something else or if I have to wait around for something and can't leave. Or if I come back from classes, tired and grumpy, and still have to do things when I would rather sleep.
But today isn't like that, it's the first tie in a long time that I have been able to putz around here on the weekends at a decent time and hopefully get some work done. All things in moderation.
I have a really odd feeling that this album is going to become a compilation of various flowers that I find.
Though to be fair, I feel like that is somewhat justified after the crazy winter we had.
So earlier today my mom brought these for me and then I got to have lunch with her and my dad-yay for getting real people food! I didn't get a ton of time to spend with them because they had things to do and places to be and so did I. But, it was nice to have a reminder of the life and world outside of Wellesley. Like I said in an earlier post, I can get so caught up in all of the school work...but they don't even really know what any of my classes are really about unless I vent at them so there's the chance to remove myself from the academic things for a bit if I want to.
There were also lots of other parents on campus this weekend. I have been informed that this was due to Marathon Monday and Easter/the long weekend in general but I don't recall seeing these many family members putzing around campus last year.
In any case, I have a feeling that these lovely pansies aren't going to stay in my possession for very long but I am certainly going to enjoy them while they are here!
Day 1(17 April 2014): So I actually took this picture on my way to the Science Center from Tower. I had actually wanted to take a picture of the lake but couldn't because there was a couple canoodling there so I would have felt incredibly awkward taking a picture. I wasn't sure if these were violets or not but either way they were pretty striking against the mulch and trees. It was a really beautiful crisp day outside. It was actually pretty close to my
ideal weather-sunny, clear and cool. Organic Chemistry lab was another thing entirely but it was nice to have a reminder that there are things that pretty much guaranteed to happen by the universe-a comforting thought to hold on to while everything else is so uncertain.
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Day 2 (18 April 2014): I had intended to take a picture at Bazaar, a market event hosted by my organization but it must have slipped my mind while I was caught up in the event. Luckily there were plenty of other cameras being whipped out so it will be a very well documented event. Instead we have this lovely vista instead. Normally, this is not something I would bother Instagramming out of fear of boring my followers to death. But, for the project I think it actually makes a lot of sense. Now, I generally don't even train on land because I think that swimming is vastly superior to most forms of exercise for me in terms of physical exertion and mental catharsis but today because of the event, I found myself wanting to exercise....after pool hours. So, I hopped on the elliptical in Tower. I had just come from Bazaar and while I enjoy being relatively dressy on a daily basis there was something incredibly satisfying about just throwing on a t-shirt and shorts to exercise. I think I (and probably lots of other people) spend a fair amount of time trying to be relatively glamorous that the moments of not being glam are absolutely liberating. I think for me, one of the most wonderful things about exercise is that it does double duty. On the one hand, it's good for you it makes you stronger and healthier physically. For me though, it also functions as my time to check out from the world, if only temporarily. It's really a win-win situation no matter how you cut it. It also has made me rather tired so I'm probably going to stop rambling now and go to bed. But, I also just wanted to say that I had the thought that this project might evolve into me just taking pictures of random places/things around Wellesley-the things that you never see in the admissions pamphlets or (usually) on Instagram. Uncommon vistas-I'm okay with this. The better to remember the real Wellesley by.
I recently heard of a project called #100happydays. It is a challenge in which people are asked to see if they can be happy for one hundred days in a row. The premise of the challenge was to have users submit photos every single day to document their happiness. I think the objective was to make people more aware of the fact that there are things in their days that make them happy.
When I first heard of the project, I was a little bit skeptical. I thought there was no way that I would actually have the resolve to keep up with the challenge for 100 days in a row, especially since I am entering my testing and application period.
So naturally, I have to do it.
I admit, I still have some reservations. I'm worried that I might annoy people by flooding their Instagram(my social network of choice) with really mundane pictures. I am kind of anticipating that there will be lots of pictures of various cups of tea and books. I am worried that I will try the challenge and expect massive life-altering results and not get them and be terribly disappointed.
But, it's just so intriguing that I have to try anyways.
I find the project compelling for a couple of reasons. For anyone who has been around me in the last year knows that this has not been a very easy or fun time for me. It's been a time of transition and a lot of things all happening at once. I have kind of lost count of the times the though "I do not have time to be a real person right now" has crossed my mind(which is hugely problematic). And yes, it has been exceptionally lonely at times. But all the more reason that I think that this project speaks to me. Even in the hugely stressful times, there is always something there to make me happy even if I have to work harder to find it and I really do believe that.
More than just the cathartic reasons for doing this, I actually am kind of curious as to what makes me happy. It sounds ridiculous but I wonder what I gravitate towards and I think it will be really interesting for me to come back and look through things once it is all said and done. So, I've resolved that in addition to the daily picture, I am going to try and write a post so that I can remember what made me happy and elaborate on why it made me happy. They'll be shorter than the posts that came before this one but I am excited to have a sort of daily ritual in place.
And hey, I'm back to writing again. So basically, I'm already winning the challenge for every day that I write.
I watched the video that Laci Green uploaded earlier this month in which she reveals to us the time capsule video that she made for herself in 2009, her present-day reaction to it and a new time capsule video to be viewed in 2019.
Unfortunately, I didn't have the foresight to write a blog post to myself in 2009 but I have the next best thing...Facebook! So let's delve into a bit of recent history:
I don't remember what I was doing just that I thought I was cool
Allow me to set the stage a bit. 2009 Tiffany (as of March 2009-when Laci posted her video), was 15.5 years old. She lived in Hopkinton, MA and was pretty obsessed with getting into college. And not just any college of course, but a prestigious one with lots of academic and adorkable guys (ha). For some reason she thought it was appropriate to treat Facebook the way that 2014 Tiffany treats Twitter; that is to say she had no filter. She thought was really witty and edgy. 2009 Tiffany had just learned that she had to leave her hometown though which was devastating for her. She thought she had just found her niche in school. She had just wrapped her head around the idea that maybe being a doctor wasn't such a bad dream afterall. Sure, not as glam as being a fashion designer like she always wanted but she had a real shot at being good at it. During that academic year she had become really close to this one girl who she had kind of always known but been way too intimidated to get close to. But she had started talking to this girl and they became really close friends. 2009 Tiffany had been a swimmer for basically her entire life but she really started coming out of her shell and thought she had made some really good friends on the team. Following a tough break up she had found solace in being with her teammates and her coaches. And of course, don't forget about the boys. I think she was technically dating someone at the time but it had either just ended or was about to end. There were a couple of guys that she liked in her year but there was also a senior who seemed a little bit interested too. So there was that. In March, 2009 Tiffany thought she had finally gotten herself settled and established a firm base that she was willing to jump off from and really excel. But she never got to because she had to leave shortly after that.
It's a little odd to be doing something like this because even though I obviously have some distance from 2009 Tiffany (it is 5 years afterall), I still remember her vividly. I remember how she felt about things and it's kind of odd to be coming back to her years later with the perspective that I have. Going through the Facebook posts is every bit as cringe-inducing as you might imagine it. I can't even vilify myself because....I just think I was young. There are so many 'firsts' that 2009 Tiffany hadn't even experienced yet and she was already pretty jaded. Retrospectively, I think it kind of makes sense that the guys I liked didn't like me back because they probably thought I was as flighty as 2014 me thinks 2009 me was.
I have to wonder what 2009 me would think of 2014 me. She would probably be happy that I'm at Wellesley, though I don't think she would realize how difficult that road was. She would probably be disappointed that I haven't made my way to France with my best friend yet. (Said best friend actually has been to Paris, I just couldn't follow her.) She would probably be happy that I'm still swimming because going to the pool provides her immeasurable comfort. She would probably be disappointed that I neither have a boyfriend nor am hooking up with tons of cute Harvard guys. She's probably wondering why I haven't gotten myself to Tokyo yet (2014 Tiffany wonders the same thing). She probably wonders how I forgave the people in my life who it seemed had wronged me so terribly. She also probably wonders how I could have lost touch with the people that she was so close with and would probably tell me that I should text them ASAP to fix that-now that she has unlimited texting!
It's also funny because all through high school, I used to keep thinking of those days as me being in my athletic and mental prime. Spring 2009 was me at my best, or so I thought. Looking at it from now though, Facebook doesn't allow for such nostalgia-I can see exactly how silly I probably seemed to other older people at the time. But it didn't seem silly to me in the least. 2009 Tiffany felt everything so intensely and that's something I think I kind of have to admire her for. I wish I had her absolute confidence in herself that she could make anything happen for her. The world was her oyster. Which is not to say that the world doesn't still hold wonder/mystery/promise for me, I just think she had more trust in the Universe making sure that everything worked out okay.
The more that I think about this, the more that I actually still have in common with that girl. She wanted attention from boys (that hasn't really changed all that much), felt awkward around some of then (also hasn't changed much) but was most importantly at a crossroads in her life. She had to move on from something stable and good and happy and just plunge herself into the unknown. She hated it but she gave it her all nonetheless. She came off a rough romantic and academic place and I'm much in the same position now. Even though she ended up in a place that she probably would be happy with, it probably doesn't feel like she thought it would. It probably didn't happen quite the way she wanted.
Somehow I feel like history is going to repeat itself again. But I feel like the more important part of this is to just keep going, keep trying until you get what you want.
I can hardly believe that it's Spring break already and this is my first post of the "new" semester!
I am not entirely sure why but I feel like the Spring semester always catches me a bit off guard every year. Even though it's snowing and disgusting for what seems like forever in the beginning of the semester, come March it starts to get beautiful and then it feels like we have about one week to savor the weather before it's time to take exams and leave for the summer.
Not to mention actually doing work! This semester has been a really busy one for me so just making sure that I sleep and have clothes on when I leave my room has been a bit of a struggle. It's been hard enough to notice what's going on around me without sitting down and writing about it.
But we have (thankfully) reached Spring break which means that I finally have a bit of time to catch up on writing a bit! There is a lot that I have meant to write about like various TV shows (How I Met Your Mother, Sherlock, Glee), the books I've been reading, and of course some current events.
And of course, earlier this month my blog turned 2 years old! Yay! I think that also merits a post as well.
As you can see there are lots of things currently waiting in my queue but I'm looking forward to working through them in the next week!
